Phill Jupitus and the Panic Brothers at the Greys

Wednesday 7th May 2014 and we are going to the Greys to eat and then hear poetry and music.  Started badly with poor quality food.  Jackie likened it to a school dinner.  I guess we were both disappointed that Mohamed and his vegetarian curries had gone.

BUT Porky the Poet took the stage a little after 8.30pm.  He explained that he used to perform with the Panic Brothers back in the 1980s, and they had decided to re-form and had invited him to open for them again.  He also said that this gig marked the 31st anniversary of his first ever appearance, in Brighton, supporting the Piranhas.

Porky Poet aka Phill Jupitus.  Born Isle of Wight June 1962

Porky Poet aka Phill Jupitus. Born Isle of Wight June 1962  (pictures courtesy of Steve Chapman who remembered his camera and wasn’t afraid to use it)

He noted that he rarely admits to be willing to kill anyone, but he would happily kill the presenters of Top Gear, ” . . especially if they were giving a lift to Farage.”  This led into a poem about Clarkson’s love affair with cars, taken very literally by our poet for the night.  The repeated refrain at the end of each verse ran “They finally caught Clarkson f**king a car”.  In one verse he included the phrase, ” . . only takes four strokes to come”.  Having said it he stopped reading and looked straight at me – yes, me – and said “Did you see that, sir?  The use of four stroke?  Its a petrol engine, double meaning.  I was very proud of that line.”

After 21 poems, including a series of 12 haikus on Dr Who, he left the stage, returning half an hour later to introduce the diminutive Panic Brothers.  Their small size is only important because the rather taller (and wider) bearded Jupitus had to stoop down to the microphone, and this gave him the opportunity to quip that he was Hagrid introducing Bilbo and Frodo Baggins.

The Panic Brothers at the Greys, May 2014, first gig in 25 years

The Panic Brothers at the Greys, May 2014, first gig in 25 years

I’ll admit I’d never heard of the Panic Brothers. But their Everly Brothers style presentation of witty songs was great.  First time performing in public since 1989, and a few fluffs to prove it.  See some early stuff at this , their Facebook page.  One song featured Brighton as the destination of a dirty weekend that went wrong from the start – when she failed to show at Victoria station:

I made a mess

I made a mess

I made a mess

of a dirty weekend

the plans that I made

just like me

don’t get laid.

I made a mess

of a dirty weekend.

It was more Proclaimer-like, than Everlys.  Another song about living in a tiny bedsit had the memorable lines:

I’m living in a bivouac

size of a six-pack

I’d hit the road

but I’m not Jack Kerouac.

 

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